Graveyard at Noontime
by Hieiko
Summary: Written for estepheia's Friendship Ficathon, for nwhepcat. The request was: Xander and Tara, shortly after The Body. A construction site, lunch, a joke that makes Xander laugh.


Title: **Graveyard At Noontime**  
Author: Hieiko  
Characters: Xander, Tara  
Notes: Written for **estepheia**'s Friendship Ficathon, for **nwhepcat**. The request was: If Xander and Tara, shortly after "The Body." A construction site, lunch, a joke that makes Xander laugh.  
Acknowledgement: Thanks to **ladymela99** for the beta.

It was nearly noon, and while the sun's rays beat down mercilessly upon all the construction workers of Southern California, Xander Harris felt none of the warmth. He did his work efficiently, as usual, but he couldn't help feeling it was wrong. The others on the site couldn't see his grief, and he wondered if he had become good at hiding his feelings or whether he was feeling anything at all. Why hadn't any of them at least approached him, even just for a "Sorry, man"? Joyce Summers was dead, for goodness sake! Didn't they realize that?

No, they probably didn't. And even if they did, what could they say? "Hey man, sorry that your best friend's mom died"? Because, of course, they didn't know what Joyce had meant to him. Xander felt his eyes burning as he realized that Joyce herself might not have known, because he had never told her. He bit his lip hard and shut his eyes tightly to keep from crying.

A hand clamped on his shoulder as one of the men told him it was time for lunch. Only then did he remember he was supposed to meet Anya... and he was going to be late.

* * *

It might have been silly to pick noontime to visit the cemetery, but Tara hadn't been thinking about that. She simply had the sudden need to go, and she didn't question it. So she found herself in front of Joyce Summers' grave.

Out of all the Scoobies, except perhaps Anya, Tara was the one who knew Joyce the least. She had never even met the woman anywhere aside from the house on Revello. But Tara had also experienced Joyce's brand of mothering in the short time she had known her. She had welcomed the feeling of home that she hadn't felt since her own mother had passed away. Joyce had been a surrogate mother to practically all of them, since Willow's parents barely paid attention to her, Anya no longer had parents, while Xander's parents on the other hand...

Tara knew it would be very hard for Buffy right now. And she wished she could help, but there was really nothing that could ease the pain except time. She knew that all too well.

She knelt in front of the grave and rearranged the flowers there. For a moment, she merely stared at the words engraved on the stone. Nothing written on a gravestone could be meaningful enough to express who the person had been.

Then Tara began to speak, knowing as she did that Joyce wasn't really there, but hoping that she would somehow be heard. This was something she never had the chance to do when she lost her own mother.

* * *

Xander ended up just going for a walk. Anya had been too busy at the Magic Box to come with him, and he didn't feel like eating alone. Or at all, even.

But he really wanted someone to talk to. It was just his luck that none of his friends were available. So when he passed by the florist's, he bought a bouquet of assorted flowers on impulse. There was a certain lady he knew who had always been willing to listen.

* * *

The cemetery looked odd in the harsh light of day. Even though he had gone there so many times, on patrol with or without Buffy, rarely had Xander seen it in daylight. The few times were during funerals, but he had hardly been paying attention to the scenery, then. Now, though... he wondered if it was weird to think that the place sort of looked like a park? If not for the grave markers, it might have looked nice.

The place seemed deserted, though. Except for the blond girl over by a familiar grave...

It was Tara. At least, he was pretty sure it was Tara, since the girl had her back to him. She seemed engrossed in whatever she was doing, and as he got closer he noticed that she was talking to Joyce. He thought maybe he shouldn't disturb her, after all, it was supposed to be a private... conversation, if you could call it that. But then, what would he do with the flowers? Maybe he could come back later?

Tara seemed to have noticed his approach, because she paused and half-turned to look at him. "Xander!"

Obviously she was surprised to see him. "Hey, Tara. Uh, didn't expect to see you here," he mumbled.

She gave him a shy half-smile that strangely reminded him of Willow back in high school. "Hi, Xander. I-- I was just-- visiting, you know?"

"Yeah," he replied quietly. And he did know. "I brought flowers," he added, bending to place the bouquet among the others neatly arranged by the sides of the gravestone.

"They're very pretty," Tara said.

"Well, they're mostly a mixed bunch. 'Cause I could never remember which ones were her favorite," he told her.

"I'm sure she'll love them. Especially since they're from you."

"Thanks."

There was an awkward silence as neither knew what to say. They just stared at the ground, until Xander cleared his throat. "Is it true?" he asked, voice cracking slightly. He kept his eyes focused downward.

Tara looked up in confusion. "Is what true?"

"Does it really get easier? I mean..." he trailed off.

"It does, somehow. It-- it's hard 'cause we'll miss them so much, but eventually it hurts less and it'll be nice to remember the good times. But I don't think it ever really goes away," Tara replied quietly. "You really miss her, don't you?"

"Yeah," was all he could say.

"Do you need some time alone?" Tara asked. "I could go, so you could... you know."

"Nah, it's okay," Xander said, making himself comfortable beside her. "Could you just.. go on with what you were doing? I'm sure Joyce would rather listen to your voice... I mean, if that's okay with you?"

"Oh, okay, I don't mind. I was just telling her how everybody was doing, anyway," she said, smiling a little bit more.

So Xander listened, interrupting here and there as Tara recounted what she could remember about the past week. It didn't take long, though, because a low rumbling sound suddenly came from Xander's stomach.

Tara grinned at him, and Xander smiled back sheepishly. "I didn't have lunch," he explained.

Her grin only widened. "Xander Harris, forgetting food?"

"What? Is it so hard to believe?" Xander sputtered indignantly. Then his eyes narrowed slightly at her. "You've been spending too much time with Willow."

Xander's stomach growled again. Tara giggled.

"I surrender," he said, getting up from the ground. He looked at his watch, then at Tara. "Can you eat fast?"

Tara, who had also stood, gave him a quizzical look.

"I still have about fifteen minutes before I have to get back to the site. I could still get a quick lunch. Wanna come with?"

"Okay."

Later as they were about to walk off in different directions after the quickest lunch Tara ever had, she heard Xander's voice, and looked back at him.

He smiled and then ducked his head. "I just wanted to, ah, say thanks."

"Anytime, Xander. What are friends for?"


End file.
